5 Things To Do When You’re Nervous About Starting Therapy
April 24, 2024 | Written by Kade HirthSo you're ready to find a new therapist... but you're feeling incredibly nervous?
Yep. I've been there. You've been plugging along, attempting to deal with the anxiety, grief, anger, or depression on your own. You read a few blogs like this one, try some meditations you find online, and make an effort to go for walks on your lunch break. You're really trying. You're trying to take care of your mental health while also juggling all of your other responsibilities in life. And, for a while, everything stays afloat. But, eventually, little by little, something here and there starts to sink. First, you start skipping your lunches... or just spend them doomscrolling. Then, you notice you haven't been reaching out to friends like you used to. You're becoming snappier, more irritable, and, well, just not quite like yourself. And eventually, enough things start to suffer that it's finally gotten your attention. And you realize that something needs to change. Like, right now.
So you start googling "anxiety counseling near me" or something of the sort. You sift through what feels like (and is probably) hundreds of profiles of potential therapists until you find a few that speak to you. So, you figure why not book that first appointment. It's time for things to start changing, after all.
You go to click a button or submit a scheduling form or pick up the phone but then... you stop. Perhaps you notice your heart racing or your brain suddenly feels foggy. Anxiety? Nerves? Yep. That sounds about right.
Deciding to take that step and reach out to a new therapist is an incredibly brave and vulnerable act. This is someone you'll be trusting to hold things you may not have shared with others before. Things like your hurts, grief, anger, and fears. And, while feeling nervous to start something like this is entirely normal and incredibly common, those nerves can make it really difficult to actually do the thing.
So, as you’re working on reaching out to a new therapist, perhaps consider these 5 things:
1. Listen to your gut.
As you’re searching for therapists, you’ll find a bunch of different approaches to therapy. This is needed because there are so many different types of people seeking therapy for different circumstances. But, all of these approaches won’t necessarily be the right fit for you. So, pay attention to how your gut reacts to certain therapist’s profiles or websites. Do you get excited reading about what they have to offer? Feel like they’re talking right to you? Or do you feel uneasy, unsettled, or uncomfortable? However you’re reacting, that’s your body trying to give you information about what you’re looking at. Listen to yourself!
2. Look for therapists with free consultations.
These consultations usually take 15-30 minutes over video or the phone. These are a great way to ask all of your questions of a potential therapist (“How do you deal with X?” “What are your beliefs on Y?”). This time is generally pretty laid back, creating an easier atmosphere for someone who is feeling anxious. It’s also a good time to get a feel for the therapist- is this someone who’s personality you mesh with? Do you feel safe talking to them? Do you feel heard?
Generally, these consultations will be free of charge, meaning there isn’t much at stake for you. You are allowed to schedule a few consultations with different therapists, then decide who you’d like to work with. You should never feel pressured to schedule and you are always allowed to say “No”.
3. Bring a friend along to wait on you.
During that first session, bring a friend or loved one with you and have them wait in the waiting room or the car. Sometimes, it can be reassuring to know that you have someone like that just on the other side of the door waiting on you. They can also be good for a quick pep talk right before your session!
4. Don’t avoid talking about that anxiety.
Have you ever felt something, an emotion, so strongly and then, after you finally spoke about it or even just mentioned it, it seemed to take some of that intensity away from that emotion? This is common!
When we keep things to ourselves and avoid confronting them, they can often feel incredibly overwhelming. But, speak it out loud and suddenly it feels slightly more manageable. During the first consultation or session, you can say something just like “Wow, I’m really nervous!”. Then, watch how that changes your anxiety.
5. Celebrate each step.
We just love to put a ton of pressure and expectations on ourselves, don’t we? This is a process! You’re allowed to take your time, pause to process information, or ask for advice or suggestions. You are on nobody’s timeline but your own. And, at the end of the day, please remember to celebrate yourself for each step you make. That means when you first speak out loud that you need help, when you first create a list of possible therapists, or when you finally click that button to schedule a consultation… and everything in between.
You’re taking a huge step and I’m so excited for you… I hope you can be excited for yourself as well!
Feeling ready to reach out? You can book that initial consultation right here! Just click below and find a time that works best for you. Have other questions? Email me at kade@catalpacounselingllc.com.
I can’t wait to talk with you!